Friendship and Adulthood

Is it just me or does friendship shift a bit in your 20s? There are those couple of people you will always be friends with no matter where you are in life, and no matter how much time you spend apart whenever you get together it is like you didn’t miss a second. However, there are friends that you just drift apart from and may look back at someday and say, “Wow, what ever happened to her/him?”

It can be difficult to lose touch with people you once valued in your life, but it happens. Perhaps this person fit very well into your younger years but no longer fits into your adult life. You went to different colleges, had different majors, and now live in different states and have completely different lives and really nothing in common. Or maybe you went to college and they did not and you are moving forward with adventures of your own while they are still in your hometown raising kids or waiting tables.

Trust me, I’ve been there. And every now and then one will come out of the woodwork on Facebook and want to hang out and all I can think is, “What would we even talk about at this point?”

It can be easy to feel guilty for letting relationships slide by, or to feel like your “old life” has no place in your “new life”. I couldn’t wait to move from my hometown after my first couple of years in college and get away from everyone and everything that I knew. After 4 years away I moved back and I felt like I was surrounded by strangers. I had to learn how to live in my own hometown again because I had changed so much and it had not changed at all, and neither had the people living in it.

873770 / Pixabay

It’s a little depressing, I know. But there is nothing wrong with growing and changing. Change creates stronger friendships that will last forever. Those people who stick around and are always there, despite the very different lives you may live for awhile, are the people who are invaluable to have in your life

The most important thing I have learned in being an adult is to not forget what it’s like to be young. Being an adult doesn’t mean giving up all of the things you once loved, it just means enjoying them in a different way. Hold on to those few precious relationships that you have because when you feel like you can’t catch your breath, they will be that constant rock holding you in place.

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